You are NOT crazy. Yes you read that correctly. You aren’t and the best part is you are not alone. A lot of people are embarrassed, ashamed and hide really well when it comes to emotionally healing to pretend like it’s not there or they don’t need it, but you don’t have too. Sister, this does not have to be you. God placed feelings and emotions on the inside of us and thankfully, we don’t have to shun away from them. I will always encourage you to look closer within because anyone can dress up the body, but no one can dress up what’s inside the body.
I have been doing some emotional detoxing and perhaps you left that stage last year (congratulations you are more internally healthy keep up the good work!) But if this is your current stage like it is for me than allow me to share 4 things I want you to consider on your journey to becoming a better you a more free version of you.
Jeremiah 17:14 Heal me, Lord and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.
Emotional healing is a process. A process is more than overnight. Be willing, to be honest with God and yourself. Get to the root of the problem. Stop proclaiming quotes, reciting scriptures and doing what people expect of you and start getting heal so you can be made whole. God desires a clean hand and a pure heart.
yours truly Nancy F.
What is purpose? Purpose is the reason for which something is done or created for which something exists.
It was a gloomy afternoon and I was home alone. I love cleaning so I decided to sweep the entire house and spoke out loud to the Lord. In the meantime, prior to having this dialogue with Jesus, I was reading an amazing book titled “In Pursuit of Purpose” by Dr. Myles Munroe this was the assigned book to read at the book club I was a part of, but I read the book so fast because of all the wow moments I encountered. This powerful book spoke volume to my inner man and it led me to read the Bible concerning my purpose and this is where the REAL questions began……
I asked questions like this
“Lord what am I doing here?”
“What did you have in mind when you created me?
“What is the why to my existence?”
“I want to live a life where I am walking in my full assignment what does that look like?”
“You created everything for a reason so what was your reason for me?
These were few of my many questionnaires towards God. Sister, if you are serious about knowing your purpose then it is going to require you to ask intentional questions. I purposely ask those questions. I did not go around the bush or fake what I was feeling I genuinely wanted to know. I set aside time to chat with the Holy Spirit, to pray and fast because I wanted answers. I practically bothered God every day about this. See, Jesus is not hiding anything from you. He actually wants you to know Luke 12:32 “Do not be afraid, little flock for your father has been pleased to give you the kingdom) Jesus is waiting for you to ask him. Knowing your purpose is one of the most treasurable things in this lifetime. God created everything for a reason read Genesis so your existence has a reason and it is your job to seek the Lord and find and live a fulfilled Christian life. I want to share with you 5 ways to attain access to finding your UNIQUE purpose. Are you ready to tap into a whole other level? Continue reading….
The nerve of me to open my mouth bluntly and say “God, I want to help teen girls and young women” only for the Lord to save me because, at that time when I uttered those words, I was not a believer of the Gospel. Funny enough, the thoughts would not leave me. They grew and grew. I shared all my feelings with God daily. I want you to express. Tell him your deepest desires over and over again. After all, he tells us to come boldly before the throne of grace.
Scripture tells us in Matthew 7: 7-8 when you ask you shall receive. It is dangerous to keep quiet especially when you and I have access to the Kingdom of God. There are things waiting to be discovered, but you aren’t asking. Some of us grew up in religious churches where you were told to not question God about anything, but if we are his friends and no longer servants shouldn't we know what he is all about? We have the right to ask. Do not allow your thoughts or outsiders make you feel guilty for going before the Lord and desiring to know why he created you. If Abraham had back and forth dialogue with God then so can you and I.
Prayer is special communion with God. Pray always and be intentional too. I know I keep repeating this word, but it is true. An intentional heart is a honest heart. Pray without ceasing and you will get your answer. Pray, wait for him to response and then proceed. There was a season in my life when I felt God was not talking. I wanted to knock on Heaven’s door and say “Hello sir is there anybody home?” but I realized when I prayed it was not God who was mute, but it was my ability to hear. How bad do you want an answer? Pray and then take time to hear. Hint: try praying the word of God, for example if you are reading something like John 10:10 make it personal and say “God, your word says that the thief only come to destroy, but I thank you that you came that I may have an abundant life. You want me to have a satisfied life with you. Show me my purpose so I can mirror you in all that I do and please you.”
This is an extra step you can take, but it’s a great one. I love that the word of God said when you fast and not if you do. Great things unravel when you humble yourself and starve your flesh to get closer to God. He responds to prayer and fasting big time. If you don’t believe me read the bible for examples :)
5. BE OPEN TO RECEIVE
You may have found your purpose or you are about to. Be open to receive why? Well, most likely it will be BIGGER than you and you will feel unqualified for the mission. I felt so scared and in this present day I shiver within when I think about what God revealed to me in regards of my visions, the prophetic words and forth. I wanted to cry due to the simple fact, the dream does not match where I am today, but God doesn’t care. How he sees you is what matters to him. We always see the status now, but he is out of our time and he sees the bigger print.
P.S God led me to read a book which was connected to the bible. I want you to be aware that your way of finding out may be completely different from me and that’s okay as long as you discover your destiny that’s 10 times more significant. Do not try to copy me or anybody else on their journey to finding their purpose be inspired, but flow according to the spirit because that’s the best way! Funny enough, what I always wanted to do was always in me. God bought it to light. Since the eighth grade I declared out of my mouth I wanted to teach teenage girls and young women about the importance of self worth and finding true love in Jesus Christ and boom! Mind- blown. I hope you were inspired! Try these steps, the journey will be different, but the steps will work (you may get 8 more steps messing with God.)
Be bless and encouraged!
“He does not want to commit to you, but he wants to do things that committed people do.” - Nancy F
Friends with benefits can be described as people who have sex without a romantic relationship or commitment. In other words, to define this would be two individuals who casually engage in acts like a couple such as kissing, touching, and other sexual things the list goes on and on….
I want to enlighten you why this is never a good idea to pursue friends with benefits. Somewhere down the line, someone is bound to get hurt. Emotions are guaranteed to be involved. You should know from the beginning of time you were not designed to be sampled like a car in a parking lot. In addition, you are not some shirt on a clearance rack that somebody tries on in the fitting room and after they have stretch it and worn it puts it back on the clothing rack. That is not you. You are precious and worth so much more. It is up to you to know this for yourself. Matthew 7:6 “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.”
If I had to paint another picture of friends with benefits it would appear something like this, two people who agreed to stray each other along knowing there is no real chance of forming something serious. It can also pass as cousins for situation-ships I will save that for another blog post.
Why do some people agree to have friends with benefits?
I believe one of the reasons why some men and women agree to be friends with benefits is for the simple fact there is NO TITLE. When there is no title involved, there is no room to dictate what the other individual do, no legitimate reason to ask couple like questions although this happens anyways and it sends a “safe” message. I am safe if I don’t get too involved just in case I get attach and nothing come out of it or safe in protecting one heart to not be emotionally hurt. While a few may agree to its advantages of having a companion and not being lonely on days and nights when it matters the most, nevertheless, we can also agree of the disadvantage when the time come for the two to separate.
Who is most likely to be affected by FWB males or females?
Exactly how long can a situation like friends with benefits continue until it becomes more than nothing….? According to males, females are more prone to being attached in this matter rather than guys this is because both women and men view sex from different levels. A guy can have sex without inserting his emotions, however, as women more than likely it’s a big deal for us because we are sensitive, we love hard and we are emotional beings this is not to say that guys are not, but we are more in tune with our emotions than they are we are more expressive. I want you to know what you are getting yourself into and the damage it can lead for your spiritual walk with God and your physical being. This can affect you spiritually in a result of unhealthy soul ties. Sex is a soul tie with another, so despite the "no claims" something is indeed lurking in the atmosphere. 1 Corinthians 6: 15-16 a biblical reference for an ungodly and non-healthy soul ties. My goal for you is to recognize this is not a “fun fling” as it may appear to be, time invested result in something more whether you choose to believe it or not.
A wise woman shared with me, when you are friends with benefits it is like strolling you along until the right person come. This is facts. The individual is not a serious inquiry rather just a for the moment client. This is what I emphasized in the beginning when I wrote "it's up to you to know this for yourself" why? Honestly, when you know you, you are cautious to what you get yourself into.
Sister, if you know yourself then make it your business to not set yourself up for failure. It is easier said than done, but God ultimate plan for you was and will never be for a guy to use you as an object. His word talks about how wonderful you are, how many great things if he has in store for you, and the sacrifice he made sending his son Jesus Christ to partake in his eternal glory. The cost was heavy, do not bargain yourself.
I hope you are encouraged and move by this topic to start analyzing the real you the true you.