When you are testing and your answer sheet contains multiple choice questions there’s usually five options to select from. You have choice A, B, C, D and E! If you really study for your test or exam then choosing an answer will not be an issue being that you are well prepared.
In essence, your decisions are the same way. God gives us the liberty to choose. I often wonder do you recognize that there’s options for you? Do you? I hope you aren’t letting anyone rob you of your freedom.
I know you are familiar with the saying “create the life you want to live.” But often we as humans, create a life to please others. I know high school teens who are fearful of choosing a career or a business simply due to their Caribbean parents. Caribbean parents love dictating their child’s future and path for school. Some children grow up hearing “Pou kisa ou pa al fe doctor?” or “ Al fe nursing.” and while there’s nothing wrong with nurses and doctors, the issue lies in the false smirk or agreement a child makes to persuade their parents in believing that’s what they want.
College girls would hear this threat. “If you get a degree in a stupid career I won’t support you.” A stupid career choice is any choice that does not meet the parents standard….
Yes, this can create discouragement, but my question for you is simple. How long will you live under someone else decisions for your life? Your income? You can try to please mom and dad, but your life will encounter a stop sign and when the light changes color it will be up to you, then what?
HOW WELL ARE YOU UTILIZING YOUR FREEDOM?
Adam was the first man in the bible in the book of Genesis written by Moses. The Lord created everything on numerous days. He then form Adam in his image and likeness. When you read the word, you’ll see Adam had such liberty before it was taken away by his sin. He was in charge of naming the animals, the fishes and whatever else he desired. Adam named Eve. God did not name Eve, as a Leader he was in charge. Funny enough, no where in the bible did Adam ask God questions all the time concerning his choices. “God can I do this? Can I go there? May I have this?” He knew his responsibilities. Girl,do you know yours? Sometimes you are asking everyone what you should do when the decision is up to you. Ask yourself, what do I want out of life? What does God want me to have?
WHY YOU MAY THINK YOU DO NOT HAVE A CHOICE.
I remember living with my cousin. I was a senior in High school. I use to babysit my little cousins and help them with homework assignments to assure they were in good standing in school. One day, I decided to ask her to go somewhere I felt like I was doing the same boring routine. Home, school, home repeat. That was me and I no longer enjoyed that pattern. It was an afternoon, when a group of church organizations visited my school for some after school activities and all grades were welcome.
When I asked my cousin for the green light to attend she told me no. She then told me these words which is my inspiration for this blog post. “You don’t have a choice.” The anger I experienced was unexplainable. How dare she? Was my thought. I whispered within myself “I do have a choice.” Ever since then, I promised myself to never make anyone decide my life for me or make me feel caged in. You who are reading my blog, the reason why you may not think you have a choice is because someone told you, you didn’t. You believed those lies. Go back and recall a day when someone robbed you and gave you a false statement. Reclaim your power back now. Tomorrow is not promised.
WHICH ANSWER WILL YOU CHOOSE?
It all boils down to this. Which answer will you choose for your future. Are you fine and nonchalant about people interfering in your path telling you what you will and will not do? Did you give folks free tickets to impose their unwelcome negative energy on your goals by saying things like “it’ll take too long” or “everyone that ever tried doing it never got really far.” Or can you decide from this day and tomorrow and the day after, you will be the CEO on earth for your dreams. Everything that’s good and is attached with a tug within you is from the Lord. He placed it there knowing what it can produce fruit. Why are you scared of getting what’s rightfully yours? Time is always ticking, your dreams won’t become reality until you make up in your mind to achieve them.
WHAT DOES THE RIGHT ANSWER COMES WITH?
Mark this on the calendar of your heart and mind. The right answer will come with opposition. Jeremiah (in the bible) made the right choice. The Lord anointed him to be a Prophet to a nation and his delivery was not sweet. He had to tell the people some harsh stuff, but nonetheless, he persevere. There was a point, in his obedience the congregation was plotting to get rid of him. Rose, don’t be discouraged. Just because the fire is intense does not mean you did not make the right choice. Use the fire as evidence that you did make the best choice. Furthermore, the right answer is the one you listen to that is from Heaven. The right answer is the confirmation you receive over and over again from random or close people telling you to pursue that passion within you and the right answer is the one you make when nobody understands; just you and God. Every man and woman in the bible who chose the right way, God’s plan and his leading had a mighty outcome. You too can have a powerful story to share with the nation. Stop being afraid. Quit thinking it cannot happen for you, yes it will and it can. Just decide and be willing to work so your life won’t ever be the same. See you at the top, be encourage!
I want to know if anything I've mentioned resignated with you in some way. Hang out with me below and stay tune for more. Appreciate you for reading, au revior!
POP QUIZ QUESTION: How do you feel when you find out that a guy you like is not into you? Are you embarrassed? Does it make you feel weird? Less than or do you take it like a troop and keep it moving?
I’ll be real. When I use to have crushes on guys like crazy my-journey-to-singleness-after-always-having-a-man.html read about my single chronicles. I felt hurt when a guy did not have mutual emotions towards me. The sad part, I started to doubt who I was…..Please don’t ever do this why? Jesus didn’t doubt going on the cross for you, it was not by accident it was a choice. YOU are a choice.
In this blog, I’d like to share 13 signs to know when a man is not into you. Whether you are crushing, you two are talking and something happened or you are curious to know Nancy how can I tell if he does not feel the same way? Below you’ll read my point of view among other people I interviewed for the purpose of encouraging you.
WHY A GUY MAY LOSE INTEREST?
Study shows that most of the time when a man loses interest it has nothing to do with the individual. Think of that Chris Brown song where he explained that he does not feel the same way he once felt about the young lady. Rose, don’t beat yourself up or assume anything too swiftly perhaps, it’s him. He may be going through a lot and a girlfriend is not what he needs.
WHY ARE SIGNS IMPORTANT??
Every street has a stop sign that means stop completely. There is a red, yellow and green light to prevent accidents. In the same manner, signs are there to warn us from possible danger. The bible has plenty of signs if you take a sit and read. Proverbs 14:12 There is a way that seems right unto a man, but in the end, it leads to death. What about Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious for anything. These are all warnings and signs for a successful life.
WHAT TO DO WHEN THE FEELINGS IS NOT MUTUAL?
Sis, it happens. This is perfectly normal. I would not recommend sending subliminal messages on Social media knowing he follows your account this is NOT classy. Simply fix your crown and move forward. There is a guy who cannot wait to meet you and fall in love with you. It is not the end of the world. Find the courage and go.
“You should never stay where you are not wanted.” - Nancy Fleuridor
Here are the signs below! Screenshot, tweet (give me my credit lol) and share with another rose you know that’s struggling. We have all been there, nothing to be ashamed of.
1. No attention is given to you. A guy will always show interest in what he truly wants. If he is not showing it then you are not what he wants.
2. Always want to talk about sex. This is a red flag. If he is constantly talking about getting you in bed, he may like you….but for one thing.
3. Doesn’t support your dreams and aspirations. Pay close attention to his demeanor towards the conversations you two have.
4. You don’t meet important people like his family or close friends. This is a dead giveaway. Ask yourself why is he trying to keep you a secret? There is a BIG difference in a man who wants to keep a relationship on the low, but still shows you off so people will know he is taken then there’s your appearance is not shown at all. Check that sis.
5. Flirt with other girls in front of you. A guy like this is probably not ready for a serious relationship. He still want to have fun, let him by walking away.
6. Does not pursue you. I am a strong believer and witness that if a man genuinely wants you to be his, he will not lose any sleep! He will be chasing after you like a dog chase after food. Ok? Do not get it confuse.
7. Doesn’t tell you anything about himself. Something is highly up when a guy does this. What is he trying to hide? (P.s if you share things to him about you and he does not ask any questions about you in return he does not want to get to know you like that...Sis take a chill pill with cold water)
8. Only want to see you at night. Did someone say booty call?!
9. When he says he just wants to be friends. Girl, believe him. He wants nothing more.
10. Loses interest along the way. This is a tricky one and can be for multiple reasons. Maybe you are moving too fast in the conversations, maybe he found someone else he like better. Again, let him do him do not waste time crying over spilled milk, it's spilled!
11. When you are always the one texting/calling first! If you are all over him and he is not all over you… I am sorry to tell you, but he’s not that into you.
12. Secretive about his whereabouts. You two may not be married, but little petty secrets are childish. A sign of this behavior indicates he may not trust you.
13. A major sign that he is not into you is when God revealed it to you via dreams, actions, word of mouth or you feel something heavy! God has given everyone common sense + the ability to seek him. If you prayed concerning a guy and God shows you who he is, as much as you like him don’t continue entertaining him it will not be beneficial in the end.
All 13 signs were gathered from previous experiences, interviews, and research. I will add the links of my interviewers below where you are able to connect with them. I will be back with more great content for you. Thank you for hanging out with me.
Interviewers Instagram accounts:
Blog: Blog avenue
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Being Haitian and living under a Haitian household can be both bitter and sweet. Why sweet? Well, most of our Caribbean parents demonstrate tough love because they truly care about us, but have an interesting way of showing it. We enjoy their delicious meals, but at times, even that is not enough.
When I was a teenager, I did not know certain feelings and perspective were “okay” to have. My grandparents, aunts, uncles and other fellow family members assumed children at my age, did not have any massive issues to worry about. I would always hear this sentence “Ou pa genyen aucun bill pou peye se timoun ou ye. Ki pwoblem ou genyen?” this false quote and question were discouraging to hear.
Perhaps you live in a home where your parents are always at work doing their best to keep food on the table and lights in the house or you live with guardians who are not emotionally connected and doesn’t create a safe place for you to express yourself. I want you to know that’s It’s okay to not be okay. You are doing the best you can and there IS someone who cares about your personal struggles!
I wish more parents understood that school, keeping up with grades, professors, the pressure to become this A student and boys all play a role in the everyday teen life, oh and let’s not forget the puberty phase and group of friends. Below I will share a couple of resources + advice you can implement if you’re struggling with not being okay.
Ready to get lifted? This will only work when you MAKE it work.
Was this blog helpful? Hope so! Follow me to stay connected with me.
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Yes we’re living the single life we are living oooh in this 90’s kind of world I’m glad I got my girl..... finish it if you know it!
The thought of being single forever scared me at one point. I imagined how my life was would be if it lived it all alone? It was a terrifying thought, but here’s what I’ve discovered while I’m single. God is the one who placed the desire within me for marriage plus, to desire marriage isn’t a sin so don’t feel bad when other women look at you funny. (I’ve gotten weird looks due to the fact marriage isn’t really respected in this generation) Also, it’s not that deep. I’ve been without a man (my-journey-to-singleness-after-always-having-a-man.html) for quite some time. I’ll like to believe partial of it was God and then there was me. Why me? Well, Heaven and Earth must agree. Nothing happens on earth occurs without Heaven consent your girl was a bit stubborn during the beginning stages of singleness. Due to this fact, some lessons took longer to learn. Sis, God may have called you into a season of singleness, but understand the longer it takes for you to grasp what he wants to show you the longer you’ll be single.
Contentment in the Lord is GREAT gain. 1 Timothy 6: 6-11.
I cannot stress this enough, to be fully satisfied and unbothered by the cares of this life makes it easier to HEAR from Jesus. How can someone hear when they have their earplugs in? Wouldn’t you turn the volume down to understand what somebody is trying to say? In the same way, turn that volume down in your spirit and hear for instructions and clarity.
Below are 3 things I acknowledge and ran with for the pursuit of living my best life while my martial status is single.
#1 It’s not that deep. Yes marriage looks beautiful. The freedom to have someone to call your own and have legal intimacy with is amazing! But it’s not that serious. Marriage is serious, but the anxiety, the stress, the longing to be with someone is not the end of the world. There’s so much more to life that I believe we’ve put on the back burner only to study what’s to come in the future. How horrible? Jesus has given you this present life yet you are worried about every hour of it. (Matthew 6:34) Again, if God placed the desire in you to become a wife then trust that he will fulfill it. No need to worry anymore.
#2 Ecclesiastes 9:11 My favorite part of this scripture is the line that says time and chance will happen to them all. This freed me! I can have all the understanding, wisdom, skill and etc but time and chance happens to EVERYONE. God knows exactly where you are and need to be.
#3 Waiting will reveal what’s in your heart and it brings HOPE. Nothing expose you more than when you want something your heart will snitch on you. Additionally, When you want something you wait patiently for it. Hope that is seen is not hope because nobody hopes for what they can already see... I know I don’t. I don’t mind waiting on God just as long as he teaches me how to do it. Pray that God will teach you like an instructor teaches a student to wait. Wait with joy & contentment. Wait while minding your business. It's a whole world out there why aren't you living?
These were my 3 Epiphany’s. What were some of yours? Are you learning like I am in my singleness? Don’t be hard on yourself, you will make more mistakes, but after falling seven times you will stand up eight!
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Thanks for reading! Be encouraged. Xoxo
Self-Love. Let's take a minute to think about that word.
Self-Love. Let's take another minute to decide what it means.
For me, “Self-Love means accepting myself for my strengths and my weaknesses. It means trusting myself, protecting myself and most of all it means making myself happy and content.” - FaithnTurtles
Coming to this personal definition wasn't easy. Loving yourself, like many other things in life is often easier said than done. I have been saying I love myself for many years but I didn't fully know or appreciate that or what it meant until God made me appreciate it.
When I decided to transform my pain into purpose is when I truly began to love myself
How I Truly Learned to Love Myself
"For every Man shall bear his own burden"- Galatians 6:5
I have made decisions in my life that may not have been the wisest of decisions and for a long time, I was haunted by those decisions. I was haunted by the mistakes or wrong turns I felt that I made. Yet, I claimed Self-Love.
How can I love myself but at the same time not accept myself? Logically it doesn't make sense so I asked God to give me acceptance. Accepting yourself is the first step in loving and celebrating yourself.
In learning to accept yourself you will realize that you are a self.
"a person's essential being that distinguishes them from others especially considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action. "
Yourself is what makes you unique. The element of your being that sets you apart from everyone else in the world. Doesn't that sound cool?
In accepting myself I came to the realization that I am a self. I am a person with unique capabilities, unique decision-making skills, unique adversities and although these may lead to what are "common mistakes" that humans make; I am still unique in making them. This also means that I must be unique I overcoming and unique in loving myself.
I am not my decisions
I am not my decisions. After accepting myself and noting the fact that I am a self. I then noted the fact that I am not my decisions. One element of myself doesn't define me as a person. Only I can define me, no one else can.
I am not my friends, family or parents
I am not my past relationships
I am not my failures
I am not my successes
I am a product of what I have been through and overcame. I am a product of my experiences that have shaped me into a good person who strives to empower others. I am a product of my never-ending fight to be the best that I can be as instructed by God.
Who are you? Tell me on my Instagram: @faithnturtles
How can you accept yourself and come to a distinct understanding about your being but you have not forgiven yourself? How can you ask God for forgiveness but you have not forgiven yourself?
In the answers to these questions, I found self-love.
"if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" 1st John 1:9
It's a Journey
Loving yourself won't happen overnight. You need to take the time to know yourself, accept yourself, forgive yourself and then the love will find you.
It's a journey and a process of continued improvement but with faith, you will get there, if you aren't already.
I hope you got a take away from my experiences and writing. Thank you so much for reading and Thank you to Nancy for featuring me on her blog. You can read her Journey to self-love piece: here.
FaithnTurtles is a lifestyle blog created by Shanice, a Caribbean girl with Big Dreams. Shanice holds a B.Sc. in Psychology and tries to use her platform to share life and self-help tips and tricks with faith at the base.
If you would like to read more and connect with me please follow the links below.
Instagram - @faithnturtles
I wrote a couple weeks ago on my Instagram page about how I had this xs black dress that I wore to basically every outing. This dress was for movies, hanging out, graduation, dinners and church. I complained so much about not having enough options. Everyone need at least one piece in their closet that when someone says “hey let’s go out” you can depend on that item that’s in your closet. Do you have a dress, shirt, blouse or pants that’s convenient for every ocassion? …..I do.
Furthermore, after complaining to an old friend because let’s face it,what are friends for if you cannot call and complain about rubbish things? Lol…. she encouraged me to be grateful for this little black dress that someone else maybe praying for. Raise your hands if when someone is telling you the truth, but you don’t want to hear it at the moment? *and the hands go up and they stay thereeee*
However, she had a valid point. Rose, don’t be like me. I want to take the place of my friend to challenge you to think a different way. Perhaps your friends have parents who are able to afford nice clothes for them and you don’t have that access. Whatever your story may be right now keep reading and find out you can appreciate more while having less.
2. Being content with your portion.
It’s okay to want more, but it’s not okay when your mind is fixed only to acquire more. Learn this skill and it will help you grow as you live this life. Philippians 4:11. If you are always searching for more nothing you receive will be enough. The dress was not an issue, but the problem was with the owner of the dress.
3. Know that your season will change eventually
Rose, you won’t be at your parent’s house or where you are for long. You will get to a season in your life where you can start applying for jobs and work to buy your own stuff and revamp your wardrobe. The time will arrive when you can take care of yourself. So slow down and chill. I still have my dress as a reminder and there’s time I wear it creatively which brings me to point number 4
4. Work with what you have
Instead of complaining all the time get creative! Nobody knew how many times I wore my dress because each time I added my own flavor to it. Are you adding your own twist to things? So what you are not a fashionista or you may not be great at putting things together, read magazines, get on Pinterest, go thrifting and find clothes for $3.99! You are more creative than you think.
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Like, comment, subscribe to my newsletter and share with someone you know who may need this. As always, be encourage and appreciate your life more.
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My teenage years was filled with a lot of sunny days and rainy ones. I made a mess around my house trying to cook something I saw my neighbor made, I slipped and fell in front of everyone at my old middle school Thomas Jefferson Middle School and my old crush saw me, how embarrassing? It was a pleasure walking blocks from school to home with my friends. We were sweating and conversing about our day or how our teacher tried it. We even made stops to the nearest corner stores and ate junk food for dinner.
Young rose, I want you to enjoy your youth because once you transition into adulthood that's it. There's no going back and re-living those precious times. Yes, Chuck-E. Cheese will always be open for entertainment, but nothing beats the authentic summer days and actually living in the moment. I hope you aren't trying to grow up too fast you have a whole lot of lessons ahead of you. Breathe.
Below is a list of 10 things that every teen girls should know (if you don't already know.) Comment, like and share with a friend and as always be encourage!
Models Instagram page: _xx.sarahh
trackstar_nene and yourfavorite_shanty.
Thank you for reading!
Nancy F, muah.
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You are NOT crazy. Yes you read that correctly. You aren’t and the best part is you are not alone. A lot of people are embarrassed, ashamed and hide really well when it comes to emotionally healing to pretend like it’s not there or they don’t need it, but you don’t have too. Sister, this does not have to be you. God placed feelings and emotions on the inside of us and thankfully, we don’t have to shun away from them. I will always encourage you to look closer within because anyone can dress up the body, but no one can dress up what’s inside the body.
I have been doing some emotional detoxing and perhaps you left that stage last year (congratulations you are more internally healthy keep up the good work!) But if this is your current stage like it is for me than allow me to share 4 things I want you to consider on your journey to becoming a better you a more free version of you.
Jeremiah 17:14 Heal me, Lord and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.
Emotional healing is a process. A process is more than overnight. Be willing, to be honest with God and yourself. Get to the root of the problem. Stop proclaiming quotes, reciting scriptures and doing what people expect of you and start getting heal so you can be made whole. God desires a clean hand and a pure heart.
yours truly Nancy F.
What is purpose? Purpose is the reason for which something is done or created for which something exists.
It was a gloomy afternoon and I was home alone. I love cleaning so I decided to sweep the entire house and spoke out loud to the Lord. In the meantime, prior to having this dialogue with Jesus, I was reading an amazing book titled “In Pursuit of Purpose” by Dr. Myles Munroe this was the assigned book to read at the book club I was a part of, but I read the book so fast because of all the wow moments I encountered. This powerful book spoke volume to my inner man and it led me to read the Bible concerning my purpose and this is where the REAL questions began……
I asked questions like this
“Lord what am I doing here?”
“What did you have in mind when you created me?
“What is the why to my existence?”
“I want to live a life where I am walking in my full assignment what does that look like?”
“You created everything for a reason so what was your reason for me?
These were few of my many questionnaires towards God. Sister, if you are serious about knowing your purpose then it is going to require you to ask intentional questions. I purposely ask those questions. I did not go around the bush or fake what I was feeling I genuinely wanted to know. I set aside time to chat with the Holy Spirit, to pray and fast because I wanted answers. I practically bothered God every day about this. See, Jesus is not hiding anything from you. He actually wants you to know Luke 12:32 “Do not be afraid, little flock for your father has been pleased to give you the kingdom) Jesus is waiting for you to ask him. Knowing your purpose is one of the most treasurable things in this lifetime. God created everything for a reason read Genesis so your existence has a reason and it is your job to seek the Lord and find and live a fulfilled Christian life. I want to share with you 5 ways to attain access to finding your UNIQUE purpose. Are you ready to tap into a whole other level? Continue reading….
The nerve of me to open my mouth bluntly and say “God, I want to help teen girls and young women” only for the Lord to save me because, at that time when I uttered those words, I was not a believer of the Gospel. Funny enough, the thoughts would not leave me. They grew and grew. I shared all my feelings with God daily. I want you to express. Tell him your deepest desires over and over again. After all, he tells us to come boldly before the throne of grace.
Scripture tells us in Matthew 7: 7-8 when you ask you shall receive. It is dangerous to keep quiet especially when you and I have access to the Kingdom of God. There are things waiting to be discovered, but you aren’t asking. Some of us grew up in religious churches where you were told to not question God about anything, but if we are his friends and no longer servants shouldn't we know what he is all about? We have the right to ask. Do not allow your thoughts or outsiders make you feel guilty for going before the Lord and desiring to know why he created you. If Abraham had back and forth dialogue with God then so can you and I.
Prayer is special communion with God. Pray always and be intentional too. I know I keep repeating this word, but it is true. An intentional heart is a honest heart. Pray without ceasing and you will get your answer. Pray, wait for him to response and then proceed. There was a season in my life when I felt God was not talking. I wanted to knock on Heaven’s door and say “Hello sir is there anybody home?” but I realized when I prayed it was not God who was mute, but it was my ability to hear. How bad do you want an answer? Pray and then take time to hear. Hint: try praying the word of God, for example if you are reading something like John 10:10 make it personal and say “God, your word says that the thief only come to destroy, but I thank you that you came that I may have an abundant life. You want me to have a satisfied life with you. Show me my purpose so I can mirror you in all that I do and please you.”
This is an extra step you can take, but it’s a great one. I love that the word of God said when you fast and not if you do. Great things unravel when you humble yourself and starve your flesh to get closer to God. He responds to prayer and fasting big time. If you don’t believe me read the bible for examples :)
5. BE OPEN TO RECEIVE
You may have found your purpose or you are about to. Be open to receive why? Well, most likely it will be BIGGER than you and you will feel unqualified for the mission. I felt so scared and in this present day I shiver within when I think about what God revealed to me in regards of my visions, the prophetic words and forth. I wanted to cry due to the simple fact, the dream does not match where I am today, but God doesn’t care. How he sees you is what matters to him. We always see the status now, but he is out of our time and he sees the bigger print.
P.S God led me to read a book which was connected to the bible. I want you to be aware that your way of finding out may be completely different from me and that’s okay as long as you discover your destiny that’s 10 times more significant. Do not try to copy me or anybody else on their journey to finding their purpose be inspired, but flow according to the spirit because that’s the best way! Funny enough, what I always wanted to do was always in me. God bought it to light. Since the eighth grade I declared out of my mouth I wanted to teach teenage girls and young women about the importance of self worth and finding true love in Jesus Christ and boom! Mind- blown. I hope you were inspired! Try these steps, the journey will be different, but the steps will work (you may get 8 more steps messing with God.)
Be bless and encouraged!
“He does not want to commit to you, but he wants to do things that committed people do.” - Nancy F
Friends with benefits can be described as people who have sex without a romantic relationship or commitment. In other words, to define this would be two individuals who casually engage in acts like a couple such as kissing, touching, and other sexual things the list goes on and on….
I want to enlighten you why this is never a good idea to pursue friends with benefits. Somewhere down the line, someone is bound to get hurt. Emotions are guaranteed to be involved. You should know from the beginning of time you were not designed to be sampled like a car in a parking lot. In addition, you are not some shirt on a clearance rack that somebody tries on in the fitting room and after they have stretch it and worn it puts it back on the clothing rack. That is not you. You are precious and worth so much more. It is up to you to know this for yourself. Matthew 7:6 “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under feet, and turn and tear you to pieces.”
If I had to paint another picture of friends with benefits it would appear something like this, two people who agreed to stray each other along knowing there is no real chance of forming something serious. It can also pass as cousins for situation-ships I will save that for another blog post.
Why do some people agree to have friends with benefits?
I believe one of the reasons why some men and women agree to be friends with benefits is for the simple fact there is NO TITLE. When there is no title involved, there is no room to dictate what the other individual do, no legitimate reason to ask couple like questions although this happens anyways and it sends a “safe” message. I am safe if I don’t get too involved just in case I get attach and nothing come out of it or safe in protecting one heart to not be emotionally hurt. While a few may agree to its advantages of having a companion and not being lonely on days and nights when it matters the most, nevertheless, we can also agree of the disadvantage when the time come for the two to separate.
Who is most likely to be affected by FWB males or females?
Exactly how long can a situation like friends with benefits continue until it becomes more than nothing….? According to males, females are more prone to being attached in this matter rather than guys this is because both women and men view sex from different levels. A guy can have sex without inserting his emotions, however, as women more than likely it’s a big deal for us because we are sensitive, we love hard and we are emotional beings this is not to say that guys are not, but we are more in tune with our emotions than they are we are more expressive. I want you to know what you are getting yourself into and the damage it can lead for your spiritual walk with God and your physical being. This can affect you spiritually in a result of unhealthy soul ties. Sex is a soul tie with another, so despite the "no claims" something is indeed lurking in the atmosphere. 1 Corinthians 6: 15-16 a biblical reference for an ungodly and non-healthy soul ties. My goal for you is to recognize this is not a “fun fling” as it may appear to be, time invested result in something more whether you choose to believe it or not.
A wise woman shared with me, when you are friends with benefits it is like strolling you along until the right person come. This is facts. The individual is not a serious inquiry rather just a for the moment client. This is what I emphasized in the beginning when I wrote "it's up to you to know this for yourself" why? Honestly, when you know you, you are cautious to what you get yourself into.
Sister, if you know yourself then make it your business to not set yourself up for failure. It is easier said than done, but God ultimate plan for you was and will never be for a guy to use you as an object. His word talks about how wonderful you are, how many great things if he has in store for you, and the sacrifice he made sending his son Jesus Christ to partake in his eternal glory. The cost was heavy, do not bargain yourself.
I hope you are encouraged and move by this topic to start analyzing the real you the true you.